Print Page - Re: ASK BETH...

CAMELOT FANTASIES => CAMELOT FANTASIA => Topic started by: Princess Elizabeth @FiftyMovellas on November 02, 2015, 05:41:37 pm

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Olga GOA on November 05, 2015, 07:27:21 am

Quote from: Princess Elizabeth @FiftyMovellas on November 02, 2015, 05:41:37 pm

Think of me as your Camelot Agony Aunt! A thread where we all help each other with advice and share tips about anything and everything! From boy trouble to recipes to problems with appendages. We're here to help!

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COOL THEME, Hun. ::) Maybe i ask you something :D Love! :-*

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 03, 2015, 05:10:03 pm

My husband and I have been married for 13 years. He has a job that comes with plenty of stress. Recently his business has had some financial difficulties and aside from him not ever being home, he has started being very secretive. I have caught him subscribing to a **** Web site, confronted him and cleared that up. Now I have just found out that he is hiding the fact that he is smoking cigars. Fine, do it to relax. My question is, why be so secretive about things? I think it's fine to do things to help you relax, but why ****? If he wants to smoke a cigar, don't lie about it. He told me he did not purchase it, it was given to him, then I found out he did in fact make the purchase himself. Who cares, just why the lying???? How do I get my point across that I don't have a problem with this, just don't lie to me? He often lies about other things as well, nothing that means a darn, just stupid things. How do I change this??

Sounds like you are a very accommodating and understanding person, which may confuse you even more about his behavior. It may not be anything you are doing or not doing that results in his tendency to stray from the truth.

Lying is the identifiable behavior that is bothering you and it sounds like you noticed and related the behavior to his business and financial stressors, which you can always explore with him. Either way, the behavior must be confronted and addressed for the health of your relationship.

You may not be able to change his behavior, but you can be firm on what is unacceptable for you, what you expect him to work on and let him know how you can support him in dealing with this behavior that impacts the relationship. Trust is a key ingredient to successful marriages and it is hard to have trust without truth.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 03, 2015, 05:06:10 pm

I've heard that after a couple has a child, which is notably one of the happiest times in anyone's life, that the satisfaction and overall happiness in the marriage can dramatically decrease. Is this true, and why is this? What can couples do to sustain their marital happiness after baby?

Having a child can be one of the most rewarding and gratifying life experiences for a couple, yet the dynamics of the relationship are bound to change. It’s only natural that they do and the couple must be flexible and adjust accordingly.

Satisfaction and overall happiness are contingent upon how the couple navigates the relational factors involved. So, no it is not true that a decline occurs after having a child but novel challenges can emerge.

Having a child presents a new developmental stage for individuals and the couple punctuating a time of change, which influences the structure and rules of any relationship.

When a child enters the picture all attention is typically placed on the child to assure they are cared for and nurtured. This is as it should be.

It can, however, detour focus from the health of the couple/marital unit and requires significant work with open dialogue about thoughts and feelings. There may be issues related to grief/loss of how it once was; one partner may feel left out, not knowing where they fit into the new equation. It is important to feel safe enough to address these feelings directly with each other in a caring and compassionate manner. Guilt can sometimes emerge if one begins to feel jealous of the child. All of this very normal and helpful to share.

Maintaining commitment to the couple/marital relationship is a necessary component not only to the health of the relationship but it is a key factor in the quality of life for the child. Therefore, a balance must be achieved to maintain intimacy and connection with your partner. Maintaining those traditions for closeness as a couple, such date nights, romancing and actively seeking “us time” are key ingredients for success.

Yes, the baby is important but just as the flight attendant says “put the oxygen mask on yourself first, and then your child” such is true with taking care of yourself and the relationship with your spouse.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 03, 2015, 05:03:47 pm

My wife has gotten fat and now we have no love life. What to do? She doesn't seem interested in losing weight.

Tough question but the short answer is that she is your wife and supporting her with patience and acceptance is key to the relationship and your love life.

She is probably aware of the changes with her body and you have probably changed in ways as well. Change is inevitable and flexibility is required to adapt/adjust towards a healthy relationship.

If she’s not interested in losing weight, what is she interested in doing? Have you guys talked about the changes with your love life? If not, I would suggest doing so and setting mutual goals to improve it. Are you both eating healthy, talking care of yourselves as individuals and as a couple? Bodies will change and unfortunately it’s usually not for the better, so, if that is the foundation of the marriage then there may be bigger problems.

I hear your concern about the decline in your love life and I would say it is not all your wife’s weight causing the change. It may be a contributor but I’d suggest directing your attention at what’s going on in the relationship, not just with her body.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 03, 2015, 01:02:43 am

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Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 03, 2015, 12:33:19 am

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Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 03, 2015, 12:08:16 am

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Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 11:31:59 pm

10 most common complaints sex therapists hear about:

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"Women who come into my office often tell me they wish they could climax the 'real' way -- through intercourse. The clitoris, however, not the **** is the center of her sexual and pleasure nerve endings. In fact, only about 15-20 percent of all women can climax during sexual intercourse and even then she needs lots of vibration, manual or oral stimulation to get her close. For those who still want to try likely positions, I recommend two with good G-spot-penile contact: Either woman-on-top at a 45 degree angle, or woman-lying-on-her-back on a relatively firm surface with her hips rocked up (for instance, with her knees hooked around his elbows)." -- Laurie Watson, LMFT, certified sex therapist

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-10-most-common-complaints-sex-therapists-hear-from-couples_56203b85e4b06462a13b8494

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 10:21:32 pm

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Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 10:17:55 pm

Quote from: pryzmsticv on November 02, 2015, 10:11:51 pm

Well done my dear friends. There are lot ov people out there that is new sex lifes expectancies ov themselves. Dear Abby times my friends. Congratulations.

our staff of worldly scholars is smart, sexy, and have extensive practical experiences lady V.

if folks have questions, our scholars have the answers.

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Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: pryzmsticv on November 02, 2015, 10:11:51 pm

Well done my dear friends. There are lot ov people out there that is new sex lifes expectancies ov themselves. Dear Abby times my friends. Congratulations.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: JFoshia on November 02, 2015, 09:39:34 pm

See?! A well rounded group with pretty much every area covered.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 09:25:41 pm

well my expertise is in economics, statistics, and tennis.

and the beach and the sea of course.

I can be the tennis and the fitness guy.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: JFoshia on November 02, 2015, 09:13:28 pm

Don't forget yourself, Clay. You have plenty of experience in many areas as well. You will be a great source of info too.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 09:02:43 pm

you are right lady J.

yourself, The Ardent Rose, and lady Beth of "Ask Beth" will be the Camelot sexperts and Camelot sex therapists.

in addition, given our staff's expertise in the matters, you can also handle marital issues.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: JFoshia on November 02, 2015, 08:57:27 pm

Quote from: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 08:19:57 pm

Quote from: Jenny on November 02, 2015, 07:57:49 pm
Not sure if you have done this, or are working on something like it, yet, but...you could come up with a "popular" questions/answers list and post it on the first page of this thread. That way people have an idea that no question is off limits. Plus, you could ask the group here who has suggestions/ideas on specific topics, that way you could add their name to the answer portion and visitors could get an idea of who to speak with regarding that specific topic. i.e. Herbal Remedies = Ann or Victoria, Writing = Beth, etc.

Just an idea ;)

I think it is a great idea.

we can work on this tomorrow.

and you are right. no questions are off limits here for our diverse staff of worldly scholars.

Exactly! We all come from different walks of life with different backgrounds and experiences. We all have something to offer to someone, I think.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 08:19:57 pm

Quote from: Jenny on November 02, 2015, 07:57:49 pm

Not sure if you have done this, or are working on something like it, yet, but...you could come up with a "popular" questions/answers list and post it on the first page of this thread. That way people have an idea that no question is off limits. Plus, you could ask the group here who has suggestions/ideas on specific topics, that way you could add their name to the answer portion and visitors could get an idea of who to speak with regarding that specific topic. i.e. Herbal Remedies = Ann or Victoria, Writing = Beth, etc.

Just an idea ;)

I think it is a great idea.

we can work on this tomorrow.

and you are right. no questions are off limits here for our diverse staff of worldly scholars.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 08:06:19 pm

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Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 08:06:00 pm

that is a great idea lady J.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: JFoshia on November 02, 2015, 07:57:49 pm

Not sure if you have done this, or are working on something like it, yet, but...you could come up with a "popular" questions/answers list and post it on the first page of this thread. That way people have an idea that no question is off limits. Plus, you could ask the group here who has suggestions/ideas on specific topics, that way you could add their name to the answer portion and visitors could get an idea of who to speak with regarding that specific topic. i.e. Herbal Remedies = Ann or Victoria, Writing = Beth, etc.

Just an idea ;)

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: JFoshia on November 02, 2015, 07:38:41 pm

Quote from: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 07:33:20 pm

Quote from: Jenny on November 02, 2015, 07:25:59 pm
Quote from: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 07:19:42 pm
Quote from: Jenny on November 02, 2015, 06:13:11 pm
Great idea. I will help however I am able to!

our team resident scholars are going to be very hard to beat Jenny.

we have you, lady Ann, lady V, lady Beth of "Ask Beth", and so many others.

we have The Ardent Rose as well.

this is the ultimate team scholarly ladies.

Well, with that group we should have any problems covered ha ha!

affirmative.

at some point we can start directing some folks here for sexual advice and marital advice from twitter.

and that is in addition to any of the various other ailments they may be suffering from.

they can obviously look things up but there is nothing like actually hearing it from somebody who has extensive experience in these matters.

reading about something and actually talking to somebody about these issues is two different things.

That is very true! It is usually better to ask someone "live" rather than reading it on a website. Plus, you can get suggestions from people who have probably been through it, or have tried the remedies/suggestions.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 07:33:57 pm

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Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 07:33:20 pm

Quote from: Jenny on November 02, 2015, 07:25:59 pm

Quote from: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 07:19:42 pm
Quote from: Jenny on November 02, 2015, 06:13:11 pm
Great idea. I will help however I am able to!

our team resident scholars are going to be very hard to beat Jenny.

we have you, lady Ann, lady V, lady Beth of "Ask Beth", and so many others.

we have The Ardent Rose as well.

this is the ultimate team scholarly ladies.

Well, with that group we should have any problems covered ha ha!

affirmative.

at some point we can start directing some folks here for sexual advice and marital advice from twitter.

and that is in addition to any of the various other ailments they may be suffering from.

they can obviously look things up but there is nothing like actually hearing it from somebody who has extensive experience in these matters.

reading about something and actually talking to somebody about these issues is two different things.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: JFoshia on November 02, 2015, 07:25:59 pm

Quote from: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 07:19:42 pm

Quote from: Jenny on November 02, 2015, 06:13:11 pm
Great idea. I will help however I am able to!

our team resident scholars are going to be very hard to beat Jenny.

we have you, lady Ann, lady V, lady Beth of "Ask Beth", and so many others.

we have The Ardent Rose as well.

this is the ultimate team scholarly ladies.

Well, with that group we should have any problems covered ha ha!

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 07:19:55 pm

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Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 07:19:42 pm

Quote from: Jenny on November 02, 2015, 06:13:11 pm

Great idea. I will help however I am able to!

our team resident scholars are going to be very hard to beat Jenny.

we have you, lady Ann, lady V, lady Beth of "Ask Beth", and so many others.

we have The Ardent Rose as well.

this is the ultimate team scholarly ladies.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: JFoshia on November 02, 2015, 06:13:11 pm

Great idea. I will help however I am able to!

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: EquineAnn on November 02, 2015, 06:11:46 pm

Thank you very much, Clay. I also know a bit about stress relief & relaxation. It's easy to know what to do but harder to do it though. Isn't it?

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 06:06:35 pm

awesome lady Ann.

that will be good to know that you can offer some advice along those lines.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: EquineAnn on November 02, 2015, 06:04:40 pm

I know some things on herbalism & aromatherapy.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 06:03:30 pm

Quote from: Princess Elizabeth @FiftyMovellas on November 02, 2015, 05:47:23 pm

OMG I LOVE IT WITH THE PICTURE! It looks awesome!! ❤️

great image you came up with lady Beth.

I like it a lot.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 06:02:46 pm

this thread will be so cool.

who does not have a little home remedy of their own for the simple ailments. if you have encountered an ailment then seek help here.

we can all share them here.

people can come here also seek help with various issues like sex for instance. or if you have marital issues, Beth and the other scholars here have the answers.

if you have sexual issues then Beth and other ladies here can help you.

just ask away.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: EquineAnn on November 02, 2015, 05:57:53 pm

That's a good idea, Beth. You're going on the old 2 heads are better than 1 basis.

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: JFoshia on November 02, 2015, 05:57:09 pm

Well, what a great idea you two came up with!

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: EquineAnn on November 02, 2015, 05:56:24 pm

Dear Beth,

I'm sorry, this is put in poetic verse.
The other ways of putting it would be worse.
Why do I always think of others before myself?
Why have I at times allowed it to ruin my health?
Why do I always care so much about what others think?
Why do I allow it to make my self-esteem & confidence shrink?
Why does my head go 10 times faster than the rest of me when I try to do something about this?
Why can't I be totally ignorant when ignorance would be totally bliss?

Yours Sincerely

Miss EquineAnn

AB

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Princess Elizabeth @FiftyMovellas on November 02, 2015, 05:53:58 pm

Aww thank you so much Hun! It was a joint idea with Clay. I hope it draws people to interact and share with each other not just me 😊

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: JFoshia on November 02, 2015, 05:50:42 pm

What a fun idea, Beth! :)

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Princess Elizabeth @FiftyMovellas on November 02, 2015, 05:47:23 pm

OMG I LOVE IT WITH THE PICTURE! It looks awesome!! ❤️

Title: Re: ASK BETH...
Post by: Clay Death on November 02, 2015, 05:44:38 pm

what an awesome idea.

this is going to be a fantastic thread.

Title: ASK BETH...
Post by: Princess Elizabeth @FiftyMovellas on November 02, 2015, 05:41:37 pm

Think of me as your Camelot Agony Aunt! A thread where we all help each other with advice and share tips about anything and everything! From boy trouble to recipes to problems with appendages. We're here to help!

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