CAMELOT FANTASIES

In such a complicated way, like a rose in full bloom, but with one pedal stuck through with a thorn. I hunger for love, like a baby so clinging to it's mothers breast, suckling for fear of losing the nourishment it provides. 

I've found it in so many ways, fondled by it's nearness, struck by it's cupid intentions. So close but ever so far, it resisted me, fought with me, left me often, yet again, I always felt it wanted me as I wanted it.

Why do others find love and live wrapped in passion for their entire lives, while many of us just get a glimpse of love, a mild taste of it, an alluring fondness for it as it blows away from us like a hurricane trying to escape from us.

Oh why is love so elusive and bent on deceiving me into wanting it so? I've cried for it, lost for it, sorrowed in deep melancholy over the loss of LOVE, fearful of it, sick for it, and very fearful of it.

Touched by love many times, love isn't physical, it's a deep meeting of souls, who spin in time forever, never leaving each others side.

Respecting and appreciating just being human together and honest. looking deeply into each others souls, seeing the reflection from the soul, knowing that this is home, this is where we want to be forevermore. 

I weep for such a love, a soul mate never found, the friendships I've enjoyed, being open like a book, turning every page and not missing any dialogue of my life, why? what intentions did I have, was I being a fool, a coward, afraid to really be what I share or was I a deceiver and a petty thief, trying to steal another's heart, her soul and toss the passion aside, keeping just the tender words we share nothing more.

I have been torn apart with love, never really knowing the true meaning of it, maybe lust was interpreted by me as love? thinking that a woman is simply that, a physical being, nothing more but a vessel for me to enter at will and release the emptiness from my soul. Oh sweet love, why hast thou cast me aside, forsaken and buried me in the muck and mire of the dammed.

Maybe there is hope for a poet who's years are entering the senior ones. Can he find the purest and truest, deepest felt passion from another, even for just a little while, the scent of a woman lingers nearby, yet the light years of deep feeling is untouchable and unreachable in my sphere so I keep close to my heart "Somewhere In Time" we may find each other.

Mystery, it clouds your form
Ecstasy, it keeps us warm
The dance has begun, with but us two
I'll take your hand, I'll walk with you
Take me to depths in the sea of love
Go with me further, never enough
I'll breathe in your perfumed scent
You intoxicate, invade my head

Give in to your senses, here we go
Follow me now, let your heart take control
Our time is short, and death is nigh
To mountains and peaks, we must fly
Leave life behind in our own world
Get away from it all, run with me, my pearl
Forget all your troubles, walk in the moonlight
Gaze into my eyes, stay with me tonight

We need not fear, we must venture on
Forsake loneliness, drink in our love's song
Pure angel of dawn, you've stolen my heart
You illuminate me, pierce the dark
Your purity, it leaves me numb
Your beauty, where does it come from?
I long to touch your smooth, soft skin
To stroke your hair, give you everything

To pull you into my embrace
To hear you breathe, to see your face
To feel your heart beat softly with mine
To hold you tightly, leave reason behind
To draw you in, to taste your kiss
All heartbreak gone, nothing amiss
I'd lose myself inside your eyes
Stay in love forever, mesmerized

Run away with me, barefoot in the sand
Walk by my side, rule all the lands
Hear our hearts beating with love so wild
Our heads spinning with passion, my child
There's untamed joy we can't contain
Hypnotizing ardor we can't explain
I'm Romeo, will you be Juliet?
We can share a bond we'll never forget

We can clasp hands in the twilight
Hold each other, day and night
We can be alone, just me and you
Our souls entwined, you know it's true
We can do anything, if you'll take faith
I'll protect you, I'll keep you safe
We can be together eternally
We can live forever – so come with me

and she smiled nervously at his hello,
Felt the awkwardness heavy in the air-

How she'd do anything to go back
To the begin once again
Before she messed everything up
By being
Too messed up,

and would it be too much
for her to ask
If he would just
Give her second chance?

A rush enters like a veiling curtain
Of cascading water;
A vaporous fall, endlessly joining
Aqueous substances below.
Descending from a starlit heaven,
How could my heart retain
What the mind so freely extends?
I watch it contrast against the indigo
Kissed innumerably by shimmering silver.
I cannot be still while these hands explore
Every inch surrounding me,
Reflecting an assiduous mind.
I breathe deeply.

Night gives way to day,
As light quietly filters
Through glass-covered apertures.
Silence sits across the table,
Staring at me with penetrating eyes
While I consume imaginings
From a plate of emptiness.
The nothingness provided
Sustenance for conversations
That gently bent the fabric of dreams,
Revealing to me that beyond
My haunting solitude
Waits a unity only to be felt
With each pulsation of the heart.
And deeply I breathe.

I stand in the doorway
With wide, absorbing eyes.
Frost covered flowers smile
As the sun leans to embrace them,
Unfolding each petal in cyclical union.
Something awakens in me
To equalize the acute stillness
Of slumbering entities,
Exploring the unknown regions
Of active, subconscious minds.
Dreamers, what are you dreaming?
I breathe deeply.

Every high that would conceal me,
Now in sobering contrast
Manifest as echoes from past and future lives.
I cannot escape myself.
I step outward;
Physically, metaphorically;
Into the morning chill,
Stinging and clinging to my skin.
Music fills the air as she speaks.
This healing, revealing moment,
More painful and pleasurable
Than anything I have yet known
Reciprocates the tides of the universe.
And deeply I breathe

Day gives way to night.
I stare into a ceiling
Mirroring a bed of discontent
Until heaviness deepens my thoughts
And I slip into unconsciousness.
Ah, the pathways of this mind
Follow the mental footprints,
Enticing me with sighs and laughter.
A rush enters like a veiling curtain
Of cascading water;
A vaporous fall, endlessly joining
Aqueous substances below.
Cleansing light absolves me
From the mark of time
As she whispers an inquiry,
"Dreamer, what are you dreaming?"
I breathe deeply.

The world has lost its innocence,
Because of our incompetence.
The bright new minds turn dull and grey,
The beauty inside just fades away.
Kids have learned more then they should know,
With too much poison they can't grow.
The world is like a house of cards,
ready to fall if blown too hard.
Why can't the world be like it was,
is there more answers then just because?
Our world is full of selfish pride.
Words are twisted and are tied.
Our unraveled world needs a hem,
The tailor we need is a gem.
We are deaf to the cries of the poor,
while we have homes and wanting more.
What we can't have is what we want.
The devil is prepared to taunt.
The world is like a fading light,
Once so beautiful once so bright.
How did we get in such a mess?
When will we leave this emptiness?

Numb from the Memories
Memories of pain
Memories of sorrow
Memories of regret

Numb from Society
A Society of conformists
A Society of insecurity
A Society of restlessness

Numb from Love
Deceitful love
Temporary love
Inadequate love

Beautiful eyes open across a pillow top,
It seems for this moment time will stop,
The earth slows and sounds wane,
A frozen moment without stain.

Your body close to mine,
Our hearts beat in time,
With a smile of simple pleasure,
This moment should last forever.

Some say perfection is unattainable
For most things that's explainable,
But in your arms and with your heart's affection
I have found a brief moment of perfection.

To good