Guys
My parents are so pleased and proud at the positive comments my poetry has been receiving! They keep showing people- my dad even showed the postman earlier!
It's nice because they always said I'd never amount to anything- who's laughing now, eh?
I decided that I would write a little poem about my dear old dad to show the love. I already showed it to my father and he was so chuffed he rang up his work mate and insisted that I read it down the phone to him!
And now I share it with you peeps.
Daddy Made A Smell
Dads been in the toilet,
And it must have gone well,
Because there's no tissue left,
And he's left a terrible smell.
Dad, I often wonder,
What put in your tea,
Cos I never make a smell like that,
And you eat the same as me.
A smell so deep,
It speaks to the soul,
It's a wonder that the culprit,
Didn't eat through the bowl.
In there for hours,
Sometimes half the day,
What do you do in there?
Take out your willy, for a play?
When you reemerge,
You make a face and say 'beware',
But dad, I'm running late for school,
And I need to brush my hair.
Dad,I really love you,
But is it too much to ask,
That I enter the family bathroom,
Without donning a gas mask?
Christ, the stinking poison,
That emerges from your butt,
The terrible alchemy,
That occurs within your gut.
The worst thing is,
You think the situation's funny,
Like that time you acted the snake,
And blamed it all on mummy.
You shouldn't say things like that,
That mum does smelly poos,
Mother wasn't very impressed,
And one day she'll leave you.
You toilet habits are disgusting,
They leave a mental scar,
I'm sure you've got some positive points,
But Christ knows what they are.
So here a little advice for you,
Here's a little plan,
Next time you go, try opening the window,
And turn on the bloody fan!
Love ya pops xx